The Cost of Pride
by Janika
Summary: Jade visits Belkend on business and instead finds something he never knew he was missing. Post-game oneshot


**This is my first and very likely only Tales of the Abyss fic. Hopefully it won't be a flop.**

**_The Cost of Pride_**

The grinding machines filled the air with smells of oil, smoke and rust, also creating a ceaseless noise in the background. A tall man with long brown hair and a stoic expression surveyed the place, noting several new fon machines that had not been fully functioning on his last visit. It had been a surprisingly short amount of time between the beginning of their construction and their present operation. Ever since the treaty between the Malkuth Empire and Kimlasca-Lanvaldear, this city had been flooded with aspiring scientists. Perhaps it had something to do with the countries' loss of animosity with each other.

In addition to the new students, the workload had increased to the point where a foundry became necessary and now, nearly a year after the Score's destruction, Belkend had become an industrial center for mechanical parts as well. Which was the reason Jade had come. Before he had gone very far into the city, he recognized someone exiting a building nearby. Guy's eyebrows shot up with astonishment.

"It's unusual to see you anywhere other than Fabren," he remarked, making reference to the area where the replicas lived.

"I wanted to pick up an order for some new equipment personally. Last time I left it to lackeys I had less than desirable results. I'm surprised you aren't attending the flock of young ladies at your estate."

Guy groaned. "I came here to get away from them. I think the emperor is punishing me for something."

"His Highness's sense of humor is often taken that way," Jade commented dryly.

"What kind of fon machine are you trying to make?"

"The current project is focused on learning how long the replicas have before their seventh fonons dissipate naturally. Once we know that, we can see if anything can be done to lengthen their lives."

"Before they dissipate..." Guy turned thoughtful and paused a moment before speaking again. "I never said anything back then because it was Luke's place to ask...but how long did he have?"

Jade adjusted his glasses. "Unfortunately I could never answer that question reliably. The best estimate we had before the ban was three to five years, but obviously Luke had far surpassed that. It was never my area of expertise, anyway. The one who did all the research on stabilizing fonimin was Dr. Nym."

"Wait... Isn't Dr. Nym the same one who made fon-cryption?"

Jade's brow furrowed. "How do you know about that? She was working on a prototype for it before I asked her to help me with replica fomicry, but it was never completed."

"You mean you don't know?" Guy almost seemed to relish the fact that he knew something Jade didn't. "It's been all over Belkend the last two weeks. Some girl showed up and blew everyone away with it. You can encrypt virtually anything and only someone with the right fonon frequency can read it."

The waiting equipment at the foundry suddenly became much less important to the colonel. "Where can I find her?"

He pointed down the street. "There's an office just down this way with a sign out front that says Fon-Cryption. You can't miss it. Do you—_gah!_"

Without warning he dove into an alley and pressed himself against the wall, sweating profusely. Jade calmly looked back to see what had startled him and saw a young woman in a pink dress walking up the steps. She appeared to be searching for something.

"I assume the emperor's cousin is one of your new admirers, Count Gardios?"

"A persistent one—and a shrew! She demanded the staff redecorate the dining hall to match her outfit. _Please_ don't give me away!"

"Don't worry, Guy. You can make your escape easily enough. She can't run in those shoes. She's having trouble climbing the stairs as it is."

That seemed to relieve him somewhat. "I'll keep out of sight all the same. Bye."

Jade found the office without a problem. No one was inside but he ignored decorum and approached the fontech computer near the back of the room. It was on, but blank, and he was unable to access anything.

Then a young voice came from behind. "Are you here for a fon-cryption demonstration?"

He turned to see a girl in her teens wearing a white lab coat. Her face was fairly narrow and she had soft brunette hair streaked with blue, all braided and pulled back into a bun. There was no mistaking who she was.

"I would not mind," he answered.

She crossed the room and stood beside him to place her hand on a scanner. "My name is Silvi and this is a fontech program my mother invented long ago designed to hide anything on a screen from all but one person. She worked on it for years until she died, then I took it up. She's the one who trained me, after all, and I've pretty much perfected it. Ah! It's ready to scan your fonon frequency."

As she indicated, he touched the scanner and suddenly the blank screen was filled with a garish picture of modern art. Jade couldn't help blanching a little and Silvi covered her mouth to giggle.

"I always enjoy seeing people's faces when they're able to see the screen for the first time!"

"It isn't the first time," he said. "I saw Dr. Nym's first successful attempt."

Silvi grew suddenly interested. "You knew Mum? How?"

"We worked together. My name is Jade Curtiss."

The girl's eyes lit up and with a few finger-strokes the screen's image was gone, replaced by diagrams and notes. "With the exception of a few files I still can't open yet, all her work is here. I was planning on going to Fabren to see you myself in a year or so, but since you're here today I don't see any reason to wait."

Even just a fleeting glance was enough to assure him that Nym had made progress that would make his project with the replicas that much simpler. All the guesswork he'd been doing to find out in exactly what way the replicas were made could now be confirmed. He was looking at months to years of work done for him.

"I'll share everything with you on one condition: you let me work with you on replica fomicry. You're not the only one who wants to help them, you know."

Jade considered her briefly then shrugged. "I've been forced to indulge children before."

"As long as that's a 'yes' then I don't care what you mean by that," she laughed.

He remembered his last encounter with Nym when he announced he was placing a ban on the fomicry of living creatures. The intense anger and especially her accusation that he was a coward who couldn't deal with the idea of failure were burned into his memory. She had devoted herself so entirely to the research that everything else—her health, her relationships, her other work—had suffered as a result. That argument, with them both shouting at one another, ended with her promise that she would never see him again even if her life depended on it.

"I have to admit I'm curious about Dr. Nym's activities after we last saw each other."

She smiled. "Sure. My father died when I was two and Mum had to take care of our skilosaur stable outside Daath on her own. We rented out our own 'saurs and took care of the ones belonging to travelers. She kept a fontech computer in the basement and that's where she did all her research. I think she tried to do work on replica theory too but wasn't all that successful until I was six or seven. That's when she met someone who was defying the ban and had all the resources she needed."

Jade had no doubt she was referring to Van and his mouth tilted slightly downward at the thought.

"Mum never told me much about it, but sometimes she would come home fuming about one of her colleagues she always called a 'pompous idiot'. When I was older she taught me about fomicry, but about three years ago things changed..."

%*%

Silvi entered the stall of the last skilosaur in the stable and poured mash into its bucket. While it nosed the unfamiliar fodder and took an experimental lick she cleaned the road dust off with a wet currycomb, taking care to rub the spots where its harness buckles chafed. Finally she used a hand-pick to remove tiny pebbles that often got wedged between their toes and under their claws.

As soon as that was done she took the bucket of rinsing water out back and poured it in the garden. Before she could return to put away her tools, she caught sight of her mother sitting under a lone birch near the house. The ready cry of joy stuck in her throat when she noticed the expression on her face.

"Mum, what's wrong?"

Nym's head shot up, making her pure blue hair fly every which way. She tried to appear relaxed and carefree but it was too late. Even so, she put on a smile and said, "Nothing, sweetheart. How many 'saurs are we taking care of tonight?"

Silvi gazed at her with such seriousness that she seemed much older than twelve. "Mum...please be honest with me."

The woman passed a hand over her face wearily, dropping the facade. "I was desperately hoping it would never come to this, but maybe they thought I had no conscience—like that pompous idiot. A few days ago I overheard something I wasn't meant to know, and today my superior asked me to do something different. Now I know what their plans are and they're using fomicry for something terrible. I have to do what I can to stop it."

She paused and for a minute or two there was no sound aside from the wind in the trees and the nearby muttering of the skilosaurs inside the stable. Silvi could see the indecision in her mother's eyes despite the firm words. Over the last week she'd noticed the happiness that came with progress in her research drain away, replaced with worry and now finally fear.

"I have to go to Grand Chokmah..." Nym said at last. "There's a man in the royal military named Jade Curtiss. I worked on fomicry with him long ago and I know he can put an end to this corruption. They may have already guessed my intentions, so there isn't much time."

"Should we leave soon?"

Her mother's face twisted with terror. "No! You stay here,_ do you understand?_"

The girl's shocked look told her she did not.

"Please listen, Silvi," she said more calmly. "The one thing I'm glad I did is keep you a secret. As long as they don't know about you then they can't use you to get to me or my research. If you come along... I just don't want you hurt."

"So they want your work?"

"They don't need it but if they get it then it will make their plans that much easier to execute. I've used fon-cryption and enabled the loophole. Do you remember how that works?"

Silvi had to think for a few seconds before it came to her. "Doesn't it allow someone with a similar fonon frequency—like a relative—to access data bit by bit over time?"

Nym nodded. "I'm leaving everything to you."

"Mum, what exactly are you afraid of?"

Before she could react, she was being hugged with a fierce devotion. "I'm going tonight while there's still time. If I don't come back in a month, chances are it's because I'll be dead."

They knelt there on the grass, mother and daughter unable to say anything, but simply content to feel each other's love.

%*%

Silvi hung her head. "I tried to convince her not to go but she didn't listen. After a month I knew it was true. There was nothing to do except keep running the stables and try to access her files. For the last couple years I did my best to complete the fon-cryption and that's how I ended up here."

Jade considered her words. It was so simple to say her mother was dead. But a memory pressed upon him from three years prior, continuing the narrative this young girl could not.

%*%

For weeks Jade had been heavily involved with improvements on the Tartarus. It was his own personal ship and he wasn't about to leave it completely in the hands of people who wouldn't need to operate it in an emergency. He was busy instructing the assembly of the new fontech computer when a soldier approached him.

"Sir, there's been an incident. A woman traveling through Theor Forest was attacked by monsters. She's in critical condition."

"How does this concern me?" he asked stoically, still devoting most of his attention to the project at hand.

"General Frings ordered me to find you immediately. I believe the woman was asking for you by name."

Jade reluctantly commanded the engineers to halt work until he returned, then followed the soldier. But of course by the time he reached the spot it was too late. General Frings' gloves and the knees of his uniform were stained with blood and he saluted apologetically.

"I'm sorry, Colonel. She bled out before we could heal her."

Jade's face revealed none of the shock he felt on seeing her again after so many years. The green dress had gashes that showed deep wounds underneath and her blue hair —shorter than he remembered—was an untidy mess, sticky with her own blood. Her skilosaur steed was also lying dead nearby, its jugular cut.

"What happened?"

Obediently Frings gave his report. "My squad heard her screaming and went to investigate. We saw a liger attacking her and fought it off, but she had already been wounded fatally. When I tried to talk to her she kept saying your name, that she was sorry and something about a ban. I told her we would have you come immediately but I couldn't tell if she understood. A few minutes later she closed her eyes and stopped breathing."

"She was a colleague of mine and has no family relations," he said by way of explanation. "I will arrange her burial myself. There is no need for you or your squad to remain here, so you should return to your posts."

Once he was alone, the man carried Nym's body off the path a ways until he came to a rock formation. Utilizing second fonons he made a grave, placed her inside with utmost care and then reformed the stone into a casket. He would return soon with a headstone, but for now he just stood there.

All thoughts of the Tartarus had fled and the only thing he could remember as the sun sank toward the ocean was their last conversation...and how many things he regretted saying.

%*%

The memory lasted no more than a few seconds and Jade refocused on Nym's daughter.

"I see. Well, I have duties to attend. Make your way to Fabren at your convenience. If you need any assistance simply contact the pilot of the Albiore II and she will help you if you mention my name. I must be going." But just as he opened the door to leave, another thought occurred to him. "Silvi, would you mind telling me exactly how old you are?"

"I just turned sixteen a month ago. Is my age a problem?"

"That'll be fixed in time," he answered.

The brightness in her eyes reminded him all too well of someone else, and those eyes followed him to the foundry, then into his ship: the Albiore IV. They were so distracting that he hardly paid any attention to the loading of his once-precious equipment.

After leaving Belkend he turned the ship toward Grand Chokmah. He flew all that afternoon until he reached his destination and set down just outside the gate in the forest. The grave wasn't far but he was in no hurry, so by the time he reached it the only source of light to see by was the crescent moon. And when he finally arrived, Jade stood there staring. After what seemed like an hour he slowly pulled the glove off his left arm to look at the gold wedding band hidden underneath.

He placed his bare hand on the headstone and traced the words there: Nym Seren Balfour.

Once again Jade's mind clouded and he could see nothing except that day so long ago when he realized she was the one he would marry.

%*%

_On the twentieth day of the third month a woman will be waiting outside the chapel in Grand Chokmah at the noon hour. None will ever know of your marriage._

His Score for the year. And so Jade approached the chapel, deserted but for the priest within. He stood there a few moments before hearing a laugh from the garden around the corner. Sitting on the edge of a fountain was a woman in a silk blue gown that did not quite match her hair, stroking a large skilosaur while its pup stood in the shallow water, ducking its head into the spray playfully. Jade was inwardly relieved to find she was familiar to him.

"Dr. Nym Seren. Of all the women it could have been, I'm glad the Score chose you," he said.

She turned quickly, eyes widening in surprise. "Colonel Curtiss! _You're_ the one?! That is... I'm not upset, it's just I...never knew you noticed me."

"I do try to be somewhat observant." Jade gestured to the chapel, adding, "Shall we?"

"Wait. I was told we could never make this public. But I want..." Nym trailed off, quailing beneath his gaze. "Marriage is a—a transformation. I want some outward sign of this. I want to take your name."

He frowned. "Everyone will know you married me if you do that. The Score has forbidden it."

"Oh, no no! Even if I could, I would never want to take _that_ name. So many people know you, and all the attention I'd get—" She stopped, the discomfort evident on her face. "But I heard a rumor that you were adopted into the Curtiss family. If that's true then maybe I could take your old name instead."

"Balfour isn't uncommon," he said thoughtfully. "As long as no one connects it with me we would not be going against the Score."

Nym's eyes lit up brightly. Jade offered his arm to her and she stood, tying her skilosaur's reins to the wrist of a statue of Yulia. They walked together into the chapel.

%*%

Less than two years together. It hadn't been a time of imaginary marital bliss, but they certainly bore mutual respect for one another. It was only after he saw her lying dead on the path outside Grand Chokmah that he realized how much he'd cared for her. How she truly felt, he never knew for sure...especially when she walked away.

"If I had known you were pregnant I never would have let you go," he said quietly, knowing even as he did that he never should have let her leave in the first place.

But then he'd always been too proud to admit something like that. One thing he could never change was the past...but he now needed to make a decision about the future: whether to share the truth of Silvi's lineage with her or not.

"I wonder if you ever planned to tell her that I didn't really die. Is that what you meant when you told Frings you were sorry? Or did you regret your involvement with Van?"

He had no way to know that in those last moments Nym could only wish she had abandoned her pride and stayed with the only man she ever loved.

**I was personally disappointed that Jade didn't have any romantic interests throughout the course of the game...but then again it would take quite a woman to put up with him. I hope this version doesn't seem too far-fetched. ****I also named the steeds skilosaurs because they look like dog-dinosaurs. **


End file.
